Preference. Rushing around unaware of anything beyond my goals and
HUSTLE.
One thing after another after another after another a constant push forward. Blinders. Overstimulated. Disconnected. Unengaged.
SELFISH.
Propelling myself into the hope of a moment presently intangible. Forgetting. This.
NOW.
The specificities. The smallness. The eagerness. The
intimacy.
The beautiful dullness that builds slowly. Quietly unnoticed in the crevices of my secular repetitive existence. Gracefully weaving a life I can actually
love.
The slowness. The mundane. The exquisite.
SOLID. Presently preferred.
If being in a loving relationship has taught me anything, it is this. Life is not a highlight reel. Love is not a highlight reel. It is the intentional commitment to be present and love fully.
The moments and the things we work towards day in and day out are the building blocks of life, of love, of us as humans.
We celebrate and post the wins. The attainment of a goal, but life goes on. Finding your person, getting engaged, having a child are all incredibly beautiful parts of life. Making a film, writing a book, getting that dream job are all moments to be celebrated. What no one really tells you is that these special moments are secretly the closing of one chapter and the beginning of the next. It happens so suddenly that you find yourself wondering why life has suddenly slowed. It hasn’t. A new chapter has just begun, and you need to find your footing.
We all want to live in the highs, but it really is the dull, quiet moments that make life solid and memorable. The little conversations, the commitment to a budget, every “I love you” and kiss goodbye. Working together as a team to fill the days with the promises and actions that make the bigger things possible. Knowing that you and your partner are a team. Building something from the ground up together. Not every day is memorable, but it’s these little not so memorable days that provide the foundation for the memorable ones. Being comfortable with the uncomfortable or the boring, scary in between strengthens.
Being an adult means understanding this:
There is more to the story than the the party. Love is found in the commitment. Love is intentional.
Remember that when the anxiety hits. You are building a life. You are building a Great Love.